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When you notice your partner starting to transform into another person —
for instance, like dramatically changing his/her style of dressing or appearance with no clear explanation why — it can be a sign that he/she may have an affair. A third party (ie. another woman) may have recommended that he grow a beard, style his hair differently or use cologne. Dressing differently can also indicate that he might be trying hard to impress someone.
Similarly, if he is the kind of guy who typically does not exercise at all but unexpectedly becomes a gym rat, he can be trying to look nice for a potential love interest. Or perhaps he is simply frequenting the gym because he has developed a sudden interest in a woman working out there.
Mood changes can point to more than just stressful working hours. Sometimes, people get restless or irritable because they are expected to be in two places at once. When the other woman demands more of your partner’s time, he may begin quarrelling with you more often so that he can storm out to meet her. If he’s not only picking fights with you, but also bothered about stuff that hasn’t been a problem before (ie. your appearance, eating habits, intellect), it’s a clear sign that the problem lies not in you but is about another woman entirely. This is how cheating will start to cause a lot of inner friction and stress between you two parties.
In addition, in order to keep up the act of cheating, you have to concentrate on your dislikes about the other party. It is possible that by nitpicking and finding other reasons to ‘tear down’ the relationship, he will feel that his cheating is more justified and feel less guilty about it.
Infidelity will inevitably result in some sort of emotional distance, as it is impossible to invest emotionally in two people at once, and to be emotionally intimate with someone when you undermine their trust. Most people are unable to overcome the inexplicable feeling of guilt when cheating, so they build space — distance which acts as a barrier that protects him from detection. If he doesn’t say anything, the chances of him giving himself away is reduced.
When your partner avoids having one-to-one time with you, and your interactions are becoming increasingly shallow, he may drive you away because he is getting closer to someone else. Similarly, if he holds back lovey dovey couple talk (ie. no more ‘I love you’s, stops holding your hand in public and hardly embraces you anymore), it could be a purposeful cutting off of affection towards you, so he can better focus on his new partner without feeling guilty.
Guilt-ridden conduct is a sure sign of your partner keeping something from you. A guilty man tends to become overly affectionate or loving as a way to conceal his affair or to alleviate some of his inner feelings of guilt. He may suddenly lavish you with love and affection in the form of constant compliments or getting you presents even when there’s no occasion. However, keep in mind that these are not inherently the indications of an uncharacteristically good husband — they may suggest a guilty one.
In addition, if he has anything to hide, he may choose to avoid making eye contact or any form of communication, evading their partners entirely. He probably will not hold your gaze and interact properly with you, because of his inherent fear that you will be able to see through him and his secret if you look at him.
It’s not just guilty conduct that is worrying. Mysterious, odd or unexplained behaviour may also mean that he is hiding something. If your partner is being vague about his whereabouts, it is very likely that he is seeing someone else behind your back.
Strange and suspicious behaviour include: hushed phone calls and conversations, odd body language, shifting computer screen once you come into the room, unwillingness to take you places with him and his buddies etc. All this general unexplained conduct makes one feel uneasy for good reason — they could all be signs that your partner is cheating on you.
When he’s increasingly unavailable or unreachable all of a sudden, he will highly likely provide a broad variety of legitimate explanations for his increased absence (ie. working overtime, company meetings, embarking on a new project at work etc.). This may be his attempts to mask the fact that his extracurricular activities involve another woman. While the other woman generally embraces the short period of available time with him initially, it is normal for her to start to demand more and more of his time overtime. By coming up with excuses for his frequent absence, he effectively gets to spend more time with the other woman while ensuring that he does not have to constantly worry about you finding out.
You should not dismiss your intuition if you think he is behaving oddly, hiding something, or seeing someone else. In most cases, a woman’s intuition is usually right — she knows when something is wrong. Sometimes, it’s really your intuition that allows you to be able to identify the signs of your partner having an affair.
There are almost always hints along the way. Its complexity — mentally, physically and emotionally — requires lots of changes for him to pull it off. These changes tend to be unique to your partner’s character and personality. They are subtle and hardly noticeable most of the time if you don’t pay enough attention — which is why it is best to have faith in your gut that something is wrong.
A decreased interest in sex can be a sign that your partner is cheating on you. If he unexpectedly rebuffs your sexual advances when he has never turned you down previously, he may be fulfilling his sexual needs somewhere else. While many people undergo changes in their sexual behaviour overtime, if your partner is suddenly no longer interested in having sex with you, you should accept the possibility of him having an affair with someone else.
Alternatively, his mistress may be offering him something sexually that is more enticing because its ‘new’ and also a secret, so after putting all his energy into sex with her he could be too exhausted to come home and do the same with you.
This may sound ridiculous, as you may think that no man is dumb enough to bring up the woman he is having an affair with. But often cheaters take the tactic of being half honest, and if half the secret’s out, it is, in certain aspects, less of a heavy burden.
Perhaps he is thinking so much about her that he can’t resist talking about her. Even if he claims that “she’s just a friend” when you ask him about her, if his excitement is a little too much to believe, there is a very high possibility that she could be his lover he’s having an affair with.
When a man is excessively defensive in answer to questions (ie. about his whereabouts), it is a huge indication that something is wrong, because otherwise, he would laugh it off and not take things so seriously.
In the meantime. if your significant other accuses you of adultery out of nowhere, that could be because he was unfaithful himself. When a man sees how convenient and easy it is for him to engage in an interpersonal relationship, he will unknowingly place his current partner under the same moral microscope. Accusing you of unfaithfulness is a way of deflecting his guilt and shame from his own behaviour.
If you find that even after following these steps, you simply cannot confirm or disprove the adultery of your partner, it may be time for you to meet with a private investigator instead. Private investigators have the relevant expertise and knowledge to prove / disprove your theories.
Private investigators have found that in 90% of the cases they handle, clients’ suspicions about their partners (cheating) are proven. Furthermore, the evidence found can be used in court to aid in the divorce process, if it ever comes to that level.
In Singapore, a divorce can usually be obtained by demonstrating adultery or inappropriate conduct, in compliance with the Women’s Charter. Due to legal issues regarding strategies used to collect proof to prove sexual harassment with a third party, private investigators often suggest a specific technique to collect indirect evidence to prove the infidelity or unreasonable behaviour.
For example, this can involve capturing your spouse entering a budget hotel with a third party, or preparing a camera in the matrimonial home living room to film and monitor the spouse’s meetings with the third party.
Yes, you can hire a private investigator to spy on your boyfriend. Your private investigator will try to find the evidence you need (ie. to determine that he is cheating on you during the relationship).
Yes, a private investigator has a badge, but he is not required to carry it around or wear it, as their badge does not symbolise any form of authority.
No, it is unlikely that a private investigator will be able to recover the deleted text messages.
Backtracking text messages, call logs, emails and social media interactions are useful when trying to find out if your significant other is cheating on you.
In general, no, as there should be an agreement of privacy and some form of trust between husband and wife. But if the signs of infidelity are telling and the wife wants to confirm her suspicions, it is justified.
Led by veteran lady investigator with more than 30 years of Catch Cheating Spouse experience, our team is confident to help you uncover the Truth.
If you are worrying and fearful that your spouse might be cheating, you need to find ways to put your mind at ease. Best suggestion is to get hold of the truth earlier to handle the situation.
To know that a spouse is cheating can be devastating to some people, it is even worse to continue to let it happen. The safest recommendation to hire a private investigator to find out whether your husband or wife is cheating. Those who try to catch their spouse in the act of cheating, they end up worsening the situation . Private investigators from International Investigators are trained to handle infidelity cases with the utmost discretion. International Investigators have counterparts and operatives all over the world, which allow us to track your cheating spouse investigation wherever he or she might go.
Hire a private investigator to conduct surveillance on your unfaithful husband or wife if you see any of the above suspicious behaviors:
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